

For example, I’m Xena, I’m from Amazon Island, and I like to be referred to with she, her, and hers pronouns. That means the pronouns that you use in reference to yourself. If you are asking as part of an introduction exercise and you want to quickly explain what gender pronouns are, you can try something like this: “Tell us your name, where you come from, and your pronouns. Also asking about when you can use those pronouns helps protect people from being outed this can sound like “Are there any situations where you don’t want me to use these pronouns?” Try asking: “What pronouns do you use?” or “Can you remind me what pronouns you use?” It can feel awkward at first, but it is not half as awkward as making a hurtful assumption. Your actions will be greatly appreciated. Would you be okay with me taking them aside and reminding them about your pronouns?” Follow up if necessary, but take your cues from the comfort level of your student.

It may be appropriate to approach them and say something like “I noticed that you were getting referred to with the wrong pronoun earlier, and I know that that can be really hurtful. If other students or faculty are consistently using the wrong pronouns for someone, do not ignore it! It is important to let your student know that you are their ally. This means saying something like “Alex uses the pronoun she,” and then moving on.

In most cases, it is appropriate to gently correct them without further embarrassing the individual who has been misgendered. Taking an active role in your classes, you may hear one of your students using the wrong pronoun for someone. Please don’t! It is inappropriate and makes the person who was misgendered feel awkward and responsible for comforting you, which is absolutely not their job. If you realize your mistake after the fact, apologize in private and move on.Ī lot of the time it can be tempting to go on and on about how bad you feel that you messed up or how hard it is for you to get it right. The best thing to do if you use the wrong pronoun for someone is to say something right away, like “Sorry, I meant (insert pronoun)”. It’s okay! Everyone slips up from time to time.
